Joke Of The Week. The Parking Ticket.

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day, Bev my wife and I went into town and visited a shop. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.

We went up to him and I said, “Come on, man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?” He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him an “a–hole” . He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn-out tires.

So Bev called him a “s–t head”. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing more tickets. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

Just then our bus arrived, and we got on it and went home. We try to have a little fun each day now that we’re retired. It’s important at our age. (sent by Mike Chadwick)

7 Responses to “Joke Of The Week. The Parking Ticket.”

  1. 1 Dec 7th, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    Definition of a nervous wreck: A man…………….with a wife, a girlfriend AND a mortgage……ALL one month past due!!!!! peace

  2. 2 Dec 8th, 2012 at 10:40 am

    Like ’em both!

    Boss Hawg

  3. 3 Olive Oil Dec 8th, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    A Mexican, a Black, a Muslim and a Redneck were walking together on a beach when the Black stumbled over a bottle in the sand.

    He picked up the bottle, rubbed the sand off it, and a Genie appeared.”I can only grant four wishes,” the Genie said. “Since there are four of you, you may have a wish a piece.”

    Pointing at the Black, he said, “Since you found the bottle, you may have the first wish.”

    The Black studied for a moment then said, “I wish for a fleet of ships so that I can gather all my people and take them back to our homeland, Africa ..”

    Poof! It was done! Hundreds of ships appeared on the skyline.

    The Mexican said, “I weesh for enough Cheby peekups to take all my people back to our homeland, May-he-co!”

    Poof! It was done! Row after row of Chevrolet Pickups appeared on the beach.

    The Muslim said, “I wish for ten thousand camels to take all of my people away from this horrible country loaded with infidels so we can live in peace in Muslim countries and serve Allah.”

    Poof! It was done! ten thousand camels suddenly appeared on the beach.

    Turning to the Redneck, the Genie asked, “And what is your wish?

    The Redneck watched as the loaded pickups began moving toward the border, then looked out to sea and watched the loaded ships sailing out into the sunset, then he looked at all of the Muslims getting on top of the camels and riding off.

    The Redneck said, “Just give me a Bud Light. It doesn’t get any better than this!”

  4. 4 Rodent Dec 8th, 2012 at 3:16 pm

    Olive Oil
    Love it!

  5. 5 nicker Dec 10th, 2012 at 1:49 am

    The Devil is in the Details

    George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for.

    The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.

    Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.

    Next, Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she is finished the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars, so she writes him a check.

    Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he is finished, the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.

    When Putin hears this he goes ballistic, and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA so cheaply.

    The devil smiles and replies, “Since Obama took over, the country has gone to hell, so it’s a local call.”


  6. 6 CafeSportyTC Dec 10th, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    LMFAO nicker … oh man!

  7. 7 nicker Dec 10th, 2012 at 9:23 pm

    A Navy destroyer stops four Mexicans in a row boat rowing towards California.

    The Captain gets on the loud speaker and shouts, “Ahoy, small craft. Where are you headed?”

    One of the Mexicans puts down his oar, stands up, and shouts, “We are invading the United States of America!”

    The entire crew of the destroyer doubles over in laughter.

    When the Captain is finally able to catch his breath, he gets back on the speaker and asks, “Just the four of you?”

    The same Mexican stands up again and shouts, “No, we’re the last four. The rest are already there!”


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